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A friend may be waiting behind a stranger's face.
Never floss with a stranger.
Hello Modern Human!
Welcome to the Creative POV, where every week an artist, Jenny Whitehead, and a comedian, Mike Lukas, offer creative tips on how to put down your screen and be entertained by the world around you.
You know, like people did before the internet because they had no choice.
For this post, you’re standing among strangers at a party.
Maybe a friend invited you to the bash of the year but you arrived before they did. Or you’re the newbie at the mandatory office party. Or you’ve snuck into some strange couple’s wedding reception for free gin and tonics. Whatever the reason, you’ve ended up smack dab in the middle of a crowd of partying unknowns and you might be tempted to use your smart phone to escape.
But once in a while, do what artists and comedians do and search your surroundings for creative inspiration.
Here are three tips for doing that while stuck in a party full of strangers.
Creative POV Tip 1:
Stuck in a party full of strangers?
Scope out the place!
Artist POV
Jenny Whitehead
In a party full of strangers, social anxiety would try and get the best of me.
So, the first thing I would do is move out of the corner and navigate the room. But, as a visual person, instead of looking for someone to talk to (yet), I would search out the paintings, the knick-knacks, the wall colors and the home décor style.
Why?
Because it’s a language I understand. It buys me time to feel more comfortable in my surroundings. It’s visually entertaining. Plus, I can piece together clues about the host (who, I figure, is obligated to talk to each guest at least once during a party) AND it might trigger topics for later conversations.
Things I would notice as a I peruse around the place.
Furniture
Is it modern, minimalist, from Ikea, or a high-end gallery? (To which I would say to myself, okay, folks, where is the clutter?)
Is it hand-crafted, upcycled, foraged from a thrift store or rescued from a curb on trash day? (My kind of people)
Or am I looking at an antique handed down through generations that most definitely has a story.
Plants
Are the plants alive, dead or fake?
Answer Key:
- Alive = Attentive Plant People
- Dead = Busy Plant People
- Fake = Lazy Plant People
Floor Surfaces
Hard-wood floors, wall-to-wall carpeting, Persian rugs, linoleum, Mexican tiles, natural rock?
I’d spot repeats in the rug patterns, the pattern in the tiles, and any texture I can emulate in my next illustration or painting. There is so much color on the floor.
As you can probably tell already (if you read this blog regularly!), I am obsessed with color and how different colors play off each other. Any new environment is rich with color combinations never seen before.
I soak it all in.
Travel
I try and guess where and if they’ve traveled.
For example, did they get their Moroccan tapestry from Morocco or a TJ Maxx? Is that an actual Cuckoo clock from Switzerland? Is that an African drum made out of real human skin? Again, perfect conversation starters with anyone standing within 5 feet of the bookshelf.
Books
Is their bookshelf filled with worn, well-loved books, or shiny never-been-cracked spines with provocative titles such as ‘Shell Art From the Florida Panhandle’ or ‘How To Make Dust Bunnies Out of Dust’? And usually tucked with books are family photos.
More clues.
Why is any of this important?
In the big scheme of life, it’s not. In fact, I will probably never see these people again. But for tonight, it’s a life-saver. I have now collected questions, observations, rich information for the evening. But, better yet, I’ll be going home with more visual research for my following day in the studio.
Comic POV
Mike Lukas
Alone in a party of strangers?
Hah!
A comedian is never alone and a comedian knows zero strangers.
That’s because every warm vertical body is a potential audience member who might need a laugh or seven.
In order to entertain a roomful of strangers, a comedian would typically do their act, but that rarely works in the middle of a party.
Example:
“Hi, my name is Mike. Where are you from?”
“Just down the street.”
“Sorry?”
“I said just down the…”
“Oh, I heard what you said, I’m just sorry.”
*awkward silence*
“Are you always on?”
“Sorry?”
“Piss off…”
Instead of performing like an annoying toddler, take some quiet time to listen, observe, and gather material for performing later like a more thoughtful toddler.
At a party, there are at least three sources of material:
- The Place
- The Food
- The Peeps
The Place
The place where the party is located becomes a comedian’s impromptu stage in the same way a crime scene becomes a coroner’s.
Scoping out the party location is key to spotting potential hilarity.
Anything can be the source of clever punchlines or cruel insults depending on how long you plan on staying.
Example:
Maybe you notice the vintage couch has a trippy pattern…
Work out some possible zingers you can throw into conversations later:
- You get a free bowl of Quaaludes with that couch?
- Nice couch – did Cheech and Chong give you a discount?
- If I lift up those vintage couch cushions, I bet I find some old pennies and a young Bob Denver.
- Vintage couch? That’s a fancy way of saying decades of sweaty ass’s have been absorbed by that cloth-covered sittin’ sponge. Drop one of those couch cushions in a bucket of boiling water and make yourself a cup o’ swamp ass tea. *whispering* Scoop it from the bottom for more flavor.
Or, if you prefer to be more organic, over-compliment the party host on their home and then heighten the results.
First, say something like, “Holy shit, your house is gorgeous…I’ve decided to take the guest room for a week.”
Then, during the rest of the party, every time you see the host, heighten the game:
- There you are – could you send some fresh towels to my room? I’ve already soiled the ones that were there. Don’t ask.
- I saw your fridge has eggs – will there be an omelet station in the morning?
- I’m pumped you have cable TV *lean in* you got any of them naughty stations?
- Hey you, if it’s not a bother, could I get a hot cup of swamp ass tea sent up? *whisper* Scoop it from the top, I’m on a diet.
Next, I’d check out the food…
Creative POV Tip 2:
Stuck in a party full of strangers?
Decide, “To EAT or NOT to eat…”
Artist POV
Jenny Whitehead
When I don’t know anyone at a party and I’m feeling self-conscious, eating is the last thing on my mind.
There is no delicate way to put a cheesy finger food in my mouth while everyone is watching me (note: no one is watching me).
And there’s the whole ‘if I hold a plate with one hand and a drink in the other, how do I use a fork?’ awkwardness.
Nope.
I’d rather grab a cheeseburger on my way home than navigate a shrimp-stabbed skewer with cocktail sauce at a party.
That said, I still check out the food table. Always always.
Everything is in its proper place…
…rows of forks, knives, spoons, napkins.
…patterns of alternating square crackers and circle cheeses with olives topped in red.
…trays and platters, only brought out on such rare occasions, proudly displaying their carefully arranged hors d’oeuvres.
It’s a must-see for any visual person. Food, like almost anything, can be displayed in an artistic way.
I make sure it’s my first stop so I can see the intended layout…
…before it’s been dismantled by those other people comfortable chowing in public.
And if the party is planned by a host with a Pinterest account, all the better!
Why, there could be ten crafty ways to make appetizers out of hotdogs, a cake shaped like a bowling ball, or a three-tier margarita fountain.
Yes! For a visual delight, never miss the food table.
Eating the food is optional.
Comic POV
Mike Lukas
*** PRO TIP: Food is funny, especially if you throw it ***
Party food says something about the host and the people chowing down.
“Darling, these caviar and crème fraîche tartlets are divine.”
“Them beanie weenies make muh bottom burp.”
As I grew older, the food at the parties I attended evolved, then devolved, then improved.
At high school and college parties, the food was simple.
“Three bags of chips? Whoa, a buffet.”
“Everyone toss in five bucks so we can order a room temperature cheese pizza.”
“Hey, check out what’s in this guy’s fridge – spray cheese.”
In my late twenties and early thirties, I started going to better parties, some were even professional, either catered or made to look that way.
Swedish meatballs that make my breath smell like Eastern Europe.
Chocolate fountains that recycle the flowing chocolate like a toilet that reuses its water.
Fondue pots filled with melted cheese that everyone at the party takes a turn dipping in chunks of food without wearing gloves or washing their hands.
“Yummy cheese – is that gruyere, gouda, or Staphylococcus epidermidis?”
The idea of eating in front of strangers at a party is both hilarious and horrifying.
- Eating nachos, then having to find a private area to toothpick out a second course.
- Sneezy coughy guy checking out the buffet.
- Listening to the drunk lady with spackles of white shit on her lips and chin critiquing the dip.
- Mouth noises, dirty teeth, funky breath, stinky fingers.
Then, finally, I’d start talking to the party peeps.
Creative POV Tip 3:
Stuck in a party full of strangers?
Try drawing out the conversation.
Artist POV
Jenny Whitehead
When I finally find the courage to talk to one of the strangers around me, I may stumble on words but that’s okay.
Stranger, you are giving me 2-3 minutes of staring at your face while you answer my pre-prepared questions. I am listening, sure, but I’m also imagining how I’d draw your nose in my sketchbook.
Is it wide with large nostrils and a few stray nose hairs? Is it thin and pointed, short, delicate?
Where would I put the shadows to create the shape of your nose without “outlining” it?
Is the shape of your face round, square, pear-shape?
Do you have a widow’s peak hairline or bangs?
What is the color of your skin and which three tints in my Windsor Newton paint box would I need to create it?
Do you have any distinguishing characteristics?
Freckles? Mole? Hazel eyes? Scars? Glasses? Beard?
Noted, noted and noted!
Thank you, sir, for letting me draw your interesting face in my mental sketchbook.
So, I may leave this party hungry. I may or may not have made a new friend.
But if I took the time to be the visual person that I am, I’ll leave it feeling creatively inspired and my Rolodex of images a little fuller.
Comic POV
Mike Lukas
Now that I’ve done visual research, I’m ready to connect with the people at the party.
In other words, try out my new material on these total strangers.
PRO TIP: Timing is… everything.
Never blurt out your observations – either wait for those moments to organically appear or else pay someone beforehand to set you up proper.
Better yet, ask these strangers questions that lead to answers related to the bits and ideas you’ve already thought of, let them lead you into your material the way some cops get you to admit you were speeding.
Remember, it’s a fine line between being funny and being annoying, just ask Bobcat Goldthwaite or your mom.
Pick your moments wisely, let them unfurl organically, then yes-and them playfully – hunt those laughs like a stealthy cheetah, not a hungry hungry hippo.
Don’t need to make them laugh, instead come from a place where you enjoy giving others a chance to experience something funny, a moment to escape whatever stress they’re under. Be the flushable comedy wipe to their shitty day.
Here’s also why the world needs comedians.
Chances are you’re not the only stranger at that party.
There are plenty of other people there in the exact same situation as you – strangers at a party without the guts or guffaws to break the ice.
Comedians break that ice.
We bite the conversational bullet for the group because we’ve got the bits and balls to do it.
Comedians risk being the fool because otherwise we all stand in awkward silence staring at the lukewarm clam dip.
That’s what jesters have always done. We say what nobody else has the nerve to say. We use our humor to relay uncomfortable messages to the king. We call out that mayo-based clam dip for being housed all day near the space heater.
“That bowl of salmonella should be served with a fresh roll… of triple-ply Charmin.”
Isn’t that way more fun than staring at your smart phone?
Apologies in advance for the times we comics do get annoying.
But be honest, did you get a free bowl of Quaaludes with that couch?
Hope that gives you some fun reasons to put down your screen and let the world of being stuck among strangers at a party entertain you for a few minutes.
Next week, we’ll go over our Top-3 creative ways to enjoy sitting in a parent-teacher conference.
See you then!
Jenny & Mike
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